Us women are absolutely terrible to ourselves when it comes to loving ourselves just the way we are, aren’t we? It doesn’t matter what someone else sees or how many times people tell us we’re beautiful; until we see it ourselves it really doesn’t matter. The sad reality is that if we talked to our loved ones the way we talk to ourselves; we’d have no loved ones! It is clear that most of us women have a distorted self-image and once we start having babies; those self-images get even more distorted. Pregnancy is the most beautiful, magical and awesome miracle there is, but it can definitely take a toll on a woman’s body. This just amplifies the body image issues. Our Scottsdale Boudoir Photographers we’ve worked with so many amazing ladies and the lady being featured on this week’s blog is absolutely no exception. Tobi Blake wrote a blog about her “mommy body” issues and how she finally came to the decision to simply see herself in a loving way. She celebrated her new found love of herself by scheduling a boudoir shoot!
Boudoir photography shoot after 5 pregnancies!
Tobi wrote a blog on Meme Cabin on how she finally came to the decision to schedule her boudoir photography shoot despite her own body image “issues”! As most mother’s do; she struggled with body image after having 5 babies on her own and healing from a divorce. She was lucky enough to find the love of her life (AJ) and he was supportive of his wife in every way. Tobi opted for breast augmentation but was still looking for more. She then was going to schedule a tummy tuck thinking THAT would finally make her happy, but little did she know that an aha moment was in the near future!
Here are some awesome highlights from her blog:
I am more than a mother. And it took me 10 years to realize it.
I hated my naked body.
After 5 pregnancies, I could no longer jump or sneeze without peeing myself. My boobs, having been used as a milk dispensary for 5 hungry little monsters, became droopy and flat; my thighs and butt were covered in stretch marks and my stomach could best be described in the words of my six year old— “like the face of an old granny–” wrinkled, stretched and full of excess skin.
After working hard to lose the baby weight, I longed to feel sexy and confident in a swimsuit and…ahem…in the bedroom.
I had my breasts augmented. I still wasn’t happy.
I decided the answer to my problem was a tummy tuck. If I could just fix my wrinkly, stretched out stomach, I knew I would finally be happy with my body.
Then something happened to me in a bathroom stall… What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I robbing myself of happiness over something so stupid? I have a truly wonderful life. Why can’t I be satisfied with and thankful for the body I have? I thought about how lucky I am to be in a healthy relationship with a man who loves and respects and supports me. We don’t have a lot of money, but we are so very fortunate. We have seven fantastic children. I am healthier and happier than I have ever been. It was a moment of clarity and closure for me—a life-changing, almost spiritual moment. Sitting in that bathroom stall, I came to the conclusion that it was time to love and accept and enjoy my post-baby body. It was time to put on that damn bikini.
I decided to have some professional “sexy” pictures taken for him.
I showed him the pictures. I have never seen a man weep the way he wept as he looked at these photos.
Make sure to read the entire blog; it’s pretty fantastic!
Mom with stretch marks dares YOU to put on that damn bikini
Thanks for sharing your awesome and empowering story Tobi! We know you’ll inspire more women.